The Busy Praying Mom
Staying home is easy, when you almost didn't get to.
Let me tell you a story. I AM beyond thankful.
Being quarentined is ok with me. Here is why.....
It is 30 days that I get to be with my family and stay safe. 30 days I get to sit on the couch and cuddle up with my babies, and watch T.V.
5 months! 5 LONG months I was in a H.A.L.O. I hated that thing. If it had not been for God I would not be here today. My babies would not have their mother. (I tear up even thinking about that part.) 5 years ago I was in a head on collision. That car accident forever changed my life. I broke my neck. I had what's called Atlanto-occipital dislocation (internal decapitation). I almost lost my children, and they almost lost me.
Everything in an instant changed. When that car is flipping, and ur babies are crying..... The only thing you have left to do, is let go of the wheel, close your eyes,.... and PRAY. It happens fast ...you swear in that moment that THIS IS IT. You are so scared, you don't even feel the glass cutting you, coffee splashing you, or objects hitting you in the head. But the amount of things that go through your mind in those short minutes, are a million all at the same time. You are literally begging God to save your babies, and to save your life. I couldn't say SORRY enough. It was one of the scariest moments I have ever been through. You never forget the sounds of metal crushing, glass breaking, and tires squealing. But the one sound that plays over in your memory, is the cries of your children.
Then there is the silence. The silence of one of your children no longer screaming. You can't look, or help, or hold them. The moment that car stopped rolling, I was able to open my eyes and look over. I knew immediately my son was not ok. This is the heartbreaking moment you would never wish on any parent. You're no longer thinking about all the stuff you still have to do. You start thinking about all the stuff you will never get to do. You just want your baby to be ok. You just want to see him grow up and conquer his dreams. You want to sit on the couch and hold him. You want to sit on the floor and play dinosaurs. All of a sudden the talking back, the temper tantrums, and shooting me with nurf guns become more of a like, and less of an annoyance. So today I am so happy I get to spend this glorious time with my family. Now more than ever, I thank God I am able to be in this moment. Even if it is hard.
There are people right now, dying alone in a hospital, because no one is allowed to visit them. People are going hungry because they can't afford to buy bulk. Someone, somewhere is wishing their child was still here to spend this time with them. This is not just a lockdown. This is an oppurtunity to love a little harder, smile a little more, and PRAY your way through. I promise you, if I can spend 5 months in a Halo, you can spend 1 in your house. This Halo restricts alot of your everyday life. You can't sleep lying down anymore. You can't take a proper bath, you can't even eat normal. There is no turning your head when your child says look mommy. There is no jumping in the car and leaving. You can't hug your kids goodnight. Forget trying to look up at the stars. I felt so horrible, and helpless. It didn't take me long to stop complaining.
Because I was alive. The kids were alive. I could see them. I could feel them. I could watch them grow up, and conquer their dreams. You never know what will happen. You never know when you will fade away. I will never again complain about being stuck at home with my kids. I almost lost that oppurtunity forever. So now I heed this opportunity to the fullest. I will do it with praise and thankfulness. And I will enjoy it. Be patient. You are treading water for a reason. Just wait.